A new look at it all....

I am back up to 190 lbs and it shook me up a little bit. Not knowing what to do about it I turned to God. God , in return, put a book in front of me. It was on the sale rack at the library and I got it for a whole $1. At first I was weary about getting yet ANOTHER diet book. I took it home, stuck it on my shelf and forgot about it. I ate another 2500 calories last night. This morning I picked up the book, sat in a hot bath and read the first 3 chapters.

My heart was filled with hope and understanding. Guilt and consciousness. I am beginning to see that I can't change my eating habits without changing my heart first. I am a Christian.... I was baptised at 24 years old. But, as my pastor talked about last Sunday (coincidence??), you can grieve the Holy Spirit. You can lose that spark in you that yearns for God. I lost that spark years ago. Maybe in my quest for that perfect body??

I am focusing on a different life now. Maybe in my journey to putting that fire back in me I will also win my battle with my food addiction. God can do miracles... right!?!

I will keep you updated... and maybe even give you the name of the book!!!

Don't Worry...

I'm still here. Just suffering from computer problems. I have to use the Library computer until we can afford a new computer now... its ok really, except for the fact that I can't post on my blog as much as I would like to. My house is staying amazingly clean. :)

I am sticking to my Almased and going to the gym 3-4 days a week. I have not stepped on the scale nor have I tried on my goal jeans yet. I think I will do both sometime in December. Until then I am trying my hardest to stay focused on the goal and keep making the healthy choices.